MENTAL COLONIALISM

Posted by | Posted in Watch Gossip Girl Episodes | Posted on 24-01-2010

 

I am not out to speak good English or follow a writing style. I am here to speak my mind like I am talking to you one on one. Therefore, I won’t apologize for the way I write. My dear friend, there is something I have been thinking about for too long, It is called Mental Colonialism. That word!  Yea, lets talk about it.

I remember meeting up with Omotolani last summer in Nigeria. We arranged that she come to see in me in my hometown, Ondo. She affirmed that there is nothing really to do in Ondo town, “Ondo is for small girls”.  Keep it in mind that Omotolani was born and raised in Ondo until she went for university in Lagos. I quickly reminded her of the great asun (goat barbeque), the beautiful scenery, the breath of fresh air and the peaceful nature of Ondo town. I remember she even told me not to call her Omotolani again, that her name is now Sandra. I smiled. I thought to myself, major “ngunbeeness”!

I picked up Sandra at the motor park, and we headed home. She asked why I still talked “Nigerian”. I smiled.   I must have forgotten that I am Nigerian by birth; I think she must be reminding me. Am I missing something here?  I noticed in our conversations, Sandra seems to use more men, sh**, f*** and American slangs in her sentences than most Americans I know.  That is another story.

She started asking me about music, movies etc. She asked if I have seen this video and that video. She asked if I know of this new clothing line by this famous designer. I am sure I wasn’t really paying attention.  She has seen all the episodes of OC, Gossip Girls, and Summerland. I noticed she had a tattoo, she even told me that she smokes now. It is bigz girlz runz. Sandra was telling me that if you attend Unilag and you don’t wear at least a gold chain on your neck, you ain’t got swagga. In fact, she was even telling me about how girls while in school, get pregnant to tie a man down. I open my mouth.  “Ehen is it new? In America, there are lotta teen pregnancy, so why is your mouth wide open?”  she said.

We started watching a Nigerian movie on tv. Why is it that everyone looks flashy? Why is it that a man must wear all those earrings, designers, sun-glasses (at night), and blings on his neck to show his wealth? Why do they always show big houses? Why do those actresses remind me of Beyonce (except a crappy version)? Why do I notice an accent that sounds British? No, it sounded like American-Irish accent. On a second thought, I thought it sounded Sudanese mixed with Brazilian and Spanish. Ok I need to stop.  I switched channels now. This time it was a music channel. Is it me or do I notice more foreign women in Nigerian videos? When have you seen a Chioma in Linkin Park video? Chei!  Even Sandra said foreign girls are really beautiful. Then I said, “You must be ugly then”. She was like “haba, I be fine girl, as in, you know now”. Hmm, ok!

As if that wasn’t enough for one night. I saw a lot of dance moves that resemble that of Usher. Don’t get me wrong, its not bad to have that in videos o. I just don’t know why they have to dress like Usher. What is wrong with a man having bits and pieces of African culture in his music video? Well I think it is sexy.  I am sure if Usher wore an African outfit in one of his dance videos, a lot of Nigerian musicians will adopt that. Having said that, few artistes are doing their best by showcasing the richness of Nigerian culture in their music videos or movies. I will like to say thank you and keep it coming. Nigerian needs more people like you. Ok, I digressed. 

Anyhoo, Sandra and I went shopping. I saw some London wax, and Ankara that I really loved. I bought a lot of them, took them to the tailor for sewing. I also bought some high quality t-shirts and customized my name on them with different designs and slogans. Then I saw a label called Dudu Phassion. I love their design work, so I immediately picked one up. Sandra was like “which one is dudu again? God forbid! Please lets visit Sachs, I have been dying to get that Louis Vuitton bag I told you about.” I smiled.  Major “Ngubee-ness”!

Later that night, we headed to the club. I need my inhaler on this one. Okay! I think am exaggerating now.  One thing I appreciated about the club was that they were playing Nigerian music. That was a relief!  I noticed a girl was wearing a top that looks almost like a bra with a short and a “long leather boot”. I didn’t know it was winter! I judged her, I am sorry. There was this guy with some grillz, hair plaited, pant sagging, and tattooed arms. Mehn I can see the lightening in those girls’ eyes. Its like you can read what they are saying, in their minds “he’s got swagga”. Even Sandra thinks he is sexy. One of my childhood friends, Olakunle, came to my table. Wow! I hadn’t seen him in like 5 years. “Olakunle, meet my friend Omotolani, we went to primary school together”, I said. “Hmm, pls call me Sandra, nice meeting you”.  Olakunle asked us to visit a restaurant to catch up on old times.  It was really a nice restaurant. They have both home and foreign cuisines. Everyone ordered food. Sandra decided to eat Pizza. I could tell she wasn’t enjoying it because she said she wanted to take it home. Again I smiled. Major “Ngunbee-ness”!

We got home that night and I kept Sandra’s pizza in the fridge. An hour later, she told me she was hungry. I reminded her of the pizza. She was like “omo men, the pizza wasn’t flowing o. I just wanted to be tush ‘cos ‘Kunle was there”.  I smiled while thinking she is so Ngunbee in my mind. Sandra asked why I have been smiling. She thought I was acting strange. She even asked if I’m really schooling in the U.S. She said my behavior is like that of an Ondo girl. “Kei kei kei, ngunbee o! Am I not an Ondo girl?”, I asked. , “You are but I figured you should be acting American by now, your behavior is just …..” , she replied. I smiled “Sandra my dear, listen:

Americans don’t really care about us. Western people don’t wear our clothes, they don’t eat our food, and neither do they sing our songs.  Don’t be taken over by mental colonialism. Traveling or schooling in a foreign country is not a justification to forget one’s culture but to learn about new stuff, meet new people, try new things and become a global citizen. There is nothing bad in adopting a new culture but when you see nothing good in your own culture and thinks the other culture is the norm, then something is wrong.  I call it slavery of the mind. You can have all the degrees in this world and still be ignorant.  Why don’t we patronize quality Made In Nigeria products? Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with wearing Louis Vuitton but the mentality that any designer made in Nigeria is not of high quality is bad. I am not saying we shouldn’t listen to foreign music or watch their movies. The only thing I speak against is excess. Nigerians can abuse things. We use more American slangs than Americans. We  know more songs than the Americans. We tend to even know the American culture more than the Americans. If you don’t know, men that dress with their pants sagged to their knees like those ones seen in music videos are considered irresponsible. Yet, “some” people thinks it is the swag in Nigeria.  I don’t know when smoking became a fashion statement or a bigz girlz run. Have you ever thought about the cold weather in some countries? Maybe that is why people tend to smoke a lot in those countries? Why do we use American bad habits as our own “swag”? What is wrong with having a shirt with Funke Akindele or Fela Kuti written on it?  In fact, if you can’t wear that, how about a shirt with your own name on it? What is wrong with beautiful names like Adenike (kei kei kei), Omotolani, Aisha, Olakunle, Chika, Eniola, Agbani,  Ilebaye, Musa etc? Please I’m not saying if you have an English name, something is wrong with it. Something is wrong when you change your native name to an English name just to fit in or because you think it sounds good.  And then you will see wannabe model exposing their body and people will comment, “this is sexy”. You can be sexy without showing all your nakedness. Not everyone wants to see it.  9ice in his song “Photocopy” said, “Photocopy ko easy, You could never be like me, this is my identity”.  You can’t be an American even with fake accents. Your identity is your identity. It is what makes you special. Don’t be trapped by Mental Colonialism. 

Young people have choice. Nigeria youths are very creative and enterprising. However, the embrace of this so-called American culture is disheartening. Perhaps, times have changed but it is still not an excuse to adopt another culture to a fault. I will like to see more men in their sexy African attire.  I will like to see more people speaking proper English and not “we ain’t talk to no police, we ain’t make no peace bond, we ain’t trustin in no judicial system, we shoot guns we rely on the streets, we do battle in the hood. We Gangsta” WHAT???  Can someone tell me when Nigeria started having “hood”? And no am not talking about AJegunle. I will like you to see the beauty of the Nigerian Culture. The radiance of the Nigerian woman, the fresh taste of our food, the unpolluted breath of air, the scenery of midnight tales, the orgasmic sound of our drums, the powerful effects of our proverbs, the courage of our people, the class in our fashion and the sophistication in our language. Hmm by the way, “Ngunbeeness” is an exclamation. It can be anything you want it to be. (Keikeikei, I formed it)

Above all, let us remember, that we are good people and a great nation.

Sandra thinks to herself, “Adenike you sabi talk o, all these because I pretended I like pissshaaaaa?”

 

What does a girl do to get over her ex-boyfriend

Posted by | Posted in Watch Gossip Girl Episodes | Posted on 23-01-2010

Intimacy is over without what you wish for and now you are a loner and down in the water. Questioning how to get back up on your feet when you’re still in love? Don?t feel blue, here are some important tips to bring back your smile

CLICK HERE- Steps to Get Over a Man Fast .

Examine the break-up in a different light. You don?t need to apply explanations everytime you speak to a male friend. You can ultimately spend excellent time with your friends. You don?t require to look positive 24X7! And did you recognize how much money you will preserve now that you don?t have to purchase small cute presents for him? Put that money and time to good use. Party!

The unbeatable way to get away the blues! Re-do your closet. Buy new apparel. Buy the new lipstick you?ve been desiring since the last three months. New sunglasses, pocketbooks, heels, whatever it requires to make your mind off him!

So, you don?t feeling too well about yourself now? Then change whatever you don?t like! A newly hair-do might establish you feel and look good. Or possibly a different style of make-up would suit you more. Looking happy will make you feel happier and more self-assured about yourself.

Meeting with your friends and chill out. Watch some films, gossip, catch up on the current news, have fun! You merit a break. Not only will your friends inspire you up, they?ll tell you how they constantly recognized your ex-boyfriend was a jolt (even if he was the calmest guy on the planet!). Friends rock!

Take it to yourself, you cannot get over this guy if you can?t sleep without caressing the little teddy bear he left you or if you have pictures of him erect all over your room! Get rid of the posters, letters, trinkets, and any other things that remind you of him. The most serious thing you take to do to move on is to TRY.

Join a cooking class, get guitar lessons, publish, look for different means to keep yourself occupied. As long as you let something consuming up your time, you wont get your thoughts straying towards him.

If all else goes bad, wait for new boyfriend! Never mind if he isn?t the best there is, all you want is someone to assist you get over this. This may sound very awful, but it really works!

Remember, just when you have sincerely gotten over your feelings for your ex-boyfriend can you expect to move on in life. Don?t waste worthy time crying over what could have been. For all door that closes, different one opens. But usually people keep searching at the closed door for so long that they fail to find the one that had opened for them.

Fat Bottomed Girls And The Erosion Of Female Self Worth

Posted by | Posted in Watch Gossip Girl Episodes | Posted on 23-01-2010

Do you ever find yourself apologising for your size? It is a sad fact of life that many women do these days. We’ve become indoctrinated into thinking that big is bad and thin is beautiful, and that the emaciated waifs we see in the media have the perfect must have figure.

Yet, history shows it’s actually big women that men find most attractive. The works of Renaissance masters like Botticelli and Rubens show that even the Medieval female was the object of immense fascination and scrutiny. Yet, the women immortalised on these ancient canvases little resemble the super slim celebrities of the modern age. Rather, Renaissance women are often depicted as gloriously full figured, with full bosoms, ample tummies and large bottoms.

Yet, they were still celebrated as objects of beauty…

Centuries later, American WWII bomber crews painted beautiful, plus sized “blonde bombshells” on their aeroplanes for good luck, and during the great Hollywood era, film studios snapped up busty actresses like Mae West and Jayne Mansfield, more for their buxom features than their acting abilities. The celebrated “hourglass” figures  captured on these celluloid archives continue to fascinate men to this day.

Decades after her untimely death, buxom beauty Marilyn Monroe, a definite plus size by today’s skinny standards, can still hold her own even against the sultriest modern pinups; and who can forget Britain’s very own blonde bombshell, the late, and gloriously plus sized, Diana Dors, still oozing sex appeal at age 49, in Adam Ant’s “Prince Charming” video?

At a time when the term “plus size” had yet to achieve common usage, Dors famously likened herself to a naughty seaside postcard, and shamelessly sold herself as “the first home-grown sex symbol…since Lady Godiva.” Loved in Britain for her larger-than-life off screen personality, Dors’ considerable acting skills all too often played second fiddle to her ample figure, as directors cast her again and again in the role of curvaceous siren.

As frustrating as this certainly was for talented actresses like Dors, they nonetheless made the most of their ample curves to forge highly successful careers and maintain massive male fan bases. It is curious also to note that  Dors, Monroe and West are all immortalised on the front cover of  the Beatles’ iconic album, Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band .

These women shot to stardom because the film industry and other mass media were dominated by men. At a time when Feminism was still in its infancy, it was men who dictated acceptable standards of attractiveness. Busty, curvaceous women were preferred over skinny woman because this played to the male fantasy of the perfect “hourglass” woman.

In contrast, modern celebrity women increasingly draw their self image from the plethora of glossy magazines published by women. Such magazines, full of air-brushed beauties and fascinating yet often misguided articles, play a significant role in our daily lives and have a powerful, sometimes negative impact on the way we see ourselves.

In recent decades, the dictates of such media have reshaped our perception of acceptable standards of attractiveness, fashion and size. Thin is good, fat is bad, and women the world over now live in constant fear of gaining weight. Authorities believe this has played a significant contributory role in the gradual erosion of female self worth.

Where women like Diana Dors were once coveted by a male mass media, now they are increasing the targets of ruthless criticism and ridicule. Where magazines once assisted women in their lives by offering practical solutions to everyday problems, today many serve to complicate life. “How much should I weigh?” “How young should I look?” “What diet should I be on?” are just some of the questions modern women are confronted with everyday by a celebrity-driven mass media obsessed with perfection. Indeed, recent research suggests that women today are more concerned about putting on weight than they are about developing breast cancer!

Each week, myriad magazines churn out the latest miracle diets and the latest, often  medically unsound advice on how to lose pounds and get ourselves in shape. The trouble is, these glossy gospels frequently contradict themselves and each other over what that shape is supposed to be.  As a result, confusion reigns in the modern woman’s mind.

Eating disorders, self harming and plummeting self esteem plague women today as never before. Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD), Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and addiction to botox treatments and plastic surgery are likewise on the increase. And few can now doubt the contribution that the mass media has played, and still plays, in the development of these hitherto uncommon psychological occurrences.

Medical authorities are today rightly concerned about the power these magazines have over our daily lives. After all, on what authority do the female journalists behind these fonts of feminine “wisdom” base their advice? Aren’t they just as obsessed with their self image as the rest of us? Doesn’t the phrase “does my bum look big in this?” leap from their mouths as readily as it does from ours? Rather like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz, we need only draw back the curtain to expose these self-appointed gurus for the fallible gossip mongers that they really are.

Perhaps there is more to be learned from the practical and simplistic world of men, where the term “plus size” is more likely to have a man rummaging around in his toolbox than looking in the mirror.

Not that men don’t care about how they look – they do. Indeed, men are just as vulnerable to the dictates of mass media ideas as women are. But where a woman’s self worth is linked directly to her physical attractiveness, a man’s, in contrast, is linked to his ability to wield strength and power. Even when it comes to bodies beautiful, a man’s motivation differs from that of women… Where the size of a woman’s cleavage can be indicative of her sexual prowess, the bulging biceps and rock hard abs craved by men are rather intended to intimidate other men than to attract the opposite sex.

Studies have shown moreover, that, where vanity is concerned, men are not hampered by the same doubts that plague a woman’s mind. Rather, men tend to see themselves as being slimmer and than they actually are; and, indeed, anyone who has been to a British football match will no doubt be familiar with the plethora of bare chests and naked beer bellies on display among the male dominated crowd. Such confidence and care-free exhibitionism has much to endear itself.

So, what is wrong, anyway, with having some beef on our bones?  Studies have shown that, when it comes to male expectations of a desirable female shape, women grossly exaggerate the importance of slimness in the male mindset. Moreover, history shows that men’s tastes in female body shape have remained more or less consistent throughout the centuries. Big hips, a large bust and a full bottom seem to be the order of the day.

As British rock band, Queen once put it:

I’ve been singing with my band
Across the water, across the land,
I seen every blue eyed floozy on the way, hey
But their beauty and their style
Wear kinda smooth after a while.
Take me to them lardy ladies every time!

Oh, you gonna take me home tonight?
Oh, down beside that red firelight;
Oh, you’re gonna let it all hang out,
Fat bottomed girls, you make the rockin’ world go round.

Written by Queen guitarist Brian May, this celebration of the full figured woman was a 1978 UK hit single. The front cover of “Fat Bottomed Girls” controversially featured a curvacious, semi-naked woman on a bicycle, while the lyrics expressed in a humorous yet overtly sexual tone that bigger women are more seductive and sexually appealing to men.

British male television viewers seem to share this opinion. In 2006, plus size TV presenter, Fern Britton was voted one of the TV’s most desirable women; and in the world of comedy, larger-than-life comic actress Dawn French is still considered by many men as one of Britain ‘s sexiest celebrities. So much so, that even Sheffield hunk, Sean Bean, star of Sharpe , Troy and The Lord of the Rings , couldn’t resist a cameo appearance with her in the hit UK sitcom, The Vicar of Dibley .

Clearly, women are missing something here. Perhaps men are not as fascinated by the emaciated skeletons we see in the media as we might think. Like men, perhaps we, too, should see ourselves as better than we actually are, rather than hating ourselves for what we’re not.

It’s easy to regard today’s super slim celebrities as the benchmark of feminine beauty. But it is worth remembering that the most beautiful woman in history is not to be found in the pages of our glossy magazines, nor is she seen strutting down the catwalks of the fashion world. Nor, indeed, is she captured by photographers on the red carpets of Hollywood .

Rather, she stares silently at us from the panelled walls of the Paris Louvre like a goddess…

She is, of course, the Mona Lisa , a woman whose mysterious, fulsome features, wry smile and enigmatic beauty have captivated the world for centuries.

Her creator, Leonardo Da Vinci obsessed over her, and for 500 years men have desired her. Some, perhaps, have even killed for her. And yet, she has never had a makeover nor purchased a new outfit.

Today, she’s worth more than £200 million…

What better endorsement of the plus size woman than that?

http://www.feminines-lingerie.co.uk/plus_size.php

Simon Cowell Predicts Male Idol Domination

Posted by | Posted in Watch Gossip Girl Episodes | Posted on 23-01-2010

Simon Cowell, the notoriously sharp-tongued judge on American Idol, claims that the show’s upcoming 8th season will place the male contestants on the forefront. “The guys overall, maybe about five or six of them, were just stronger and stood out more than the girls,” Cowell divulged recently to the press. “But I’ve said this in the past and been wrong. Anything can happen.” Besides the battle of the sexes, he also feels that the new batch of aspiring singers will be a more interesting and animated bunch than the previous season’s.

“Last year, it was sort of like battle of the blondes, and they all looked the same,” Cowell said. “This year, there seems to be more personality. They’re definitely standing up for themselves more, which I like, and they’re different from people that we’ve had before.”

Cowell also feels positively about the inclusion of a fourth judge in singer-producer Kara DioGuardi, a woman has actually had professional relationships with past Idol winners such as Carrie Underwood and the latest victor, David Cook. The fact that she has done so, Cowell feels, is evidence that she has no qualms about finding bona fide talent through the reality television format. “She’s got experience,” he adds. “She’s written hit songs, she’s got an opinion – which is very, very important – and she talks a lot.”

Other factors that make Cowell excited for the upcoming season is the return of the wild card strategy, which he claims will lead to “more fun” later on in the show’s run. The fact that the “Idol Gives Back” charity drive has taken a break is also a good thing in his eyes, as it will allow viewers to concentrate on working for their own bills during the recession.

The recent suicide of past Idol contestant Paula Goodspeed, however, has seemed to taint the hype on the upcoming show a bit. Cowell described the incident as “awful.”

“My regret in all of this is we didn’t know how troubled this person was, and if I could go back in time and know what she was going through, we could have spent time trying to help her,” he admits. “But we genuinely didn’t know.”

For more celebrity news and gossip, visit Celebrity Gossip Hollywood.

Games for Girls at y8

Posted by | Posted in Watch Gossip Girl Episodes | Posted on 23-01-2010

Its fun to have a daughter as a child, you can dress her up, put her into a bun, let her work on you when cooking, and a lot more! Now, once she gets tedious, you can always brighten up her day in just an easy step of opening your computer and letting her play online girls game found specifically at y8. Years ago, online games are only intended for males, with wide range of action-packed games created to suit their craving for something exciting. As time passed by and the world of internet evolves, it started to target bigger audience thus making way for games that cater to girl’s interest to come to the scene. Among the most popular y8games for girls is the makeover game which is becoming the most popular online pastimes.

There was once a survey conducted online which pave the way for the fact that young women are in fact the most “prolific” web users there is. This simply means that girls would possess more blogs, own more websites as compared to boys. Girls would normally join social networks too like Facebook and Bebo with 70 percent percentage rate while boys have the remaining 57%. The people behind the research verified that girls would use the internet as there extension of those things that they would normally do in real life such as gossiping, interacting with friends, shopping, playing, and a lot more which are linked to their everyday interests. Hence with makeover y8games, you will be able to combine the interest of most girls in improving their look and playing.

Games for girls found at y8.com 2 come into the scene the moment when programmers started to realize that the numbers of girls online would start to outnumber that of the boys and when they had proven that the online activities of girls are those that would clearly picture their offline interests. In view of this, web designers also concentrated in creating websites that are designed and created to catch girl’s interests. Among the many games for girls that can be found at y8 would include:

1.dressup games

2.makeovers

3.virtual communities

4.interactive shopping games

5.Customizable options such as the change of appearance and colors.

Now for makeover games, the rules are normally simple although some would include few features that will allow you to do few tries before you can fully learn how to do the process rightly. Most of the time, you will see a face that you paint with different colors and shades depending upon your choice. On the other hand, there are some makeover games that will allow you to fit different outfit to obtain various looks. Most of the games can be learned in just one sitting and they are free from adwares or viruses to protect your computer. Normally, online games like y8 would not necessitate many computer requirements since they would use embedded browser add-ons in order to run the application. These ad-ons would comprise of Java, Flash, Silverlight, Shockwave, and Unity